With three grown children, Lisa and Al are technically empty nesters but they didn’t like the idea of having vacant rooms in their house. They decided that since they had the space and resources, they would open their home to infants and toddlers who need a stable, loving environment while their parents take time to get their lives on track. Both Lisa and Al have a strong sense of obligation to serve others and felt fostering would be the perfect way to make a difference in the lives of young children – and fill those empty rooms!
Lisa knew she would enjoy fostering, but Al was reluctant at first. “I tend to press the gas pedal and he prefers to tap the brakes,” she says, explaining that her husband is more analytical.
“I have always been more quiet and thoughtful, listening more than I talk,” Al says. “The more I learned about fostering, the more I realized there was no good reason not to do it. It’s not about us or our comfort level. It’s about giving the kids safety, security, and attention that will stay with them for the rest of their lives.”
That’s not to say they haven’t gotten a great deal from serving as resource parents. Al happily reports that fostering helped draw his attention away from negativity in the news that had been weighing on him. He is more focused on the love and joy in the world and credits this shift to fostering. “I now understand better how to love children, especially ones who have been through trauma,” Al confesses. “We see through different eyes now.”
Lisa agrees, adding that fostering has given her deeper compassion for people because she knows that they may have complicated backstories. “You never know what a person has gone through in life and how it has shaped them.”
Lisa and Al have had two placements with Angels Foster Family Network since completing their certification and training nearly two years ago. Their first was an infant they called “Joy” who was in their care for a year before reunifying with her family. Soon after, they fostered “Manny,” a newborn who was with them for six weeks. “Saying goodbye is the hardest part,” Lisa admits. “I have to say, though, that I’m willing to shed tears so they can have joy. I can carry the burden so they don’t have to.”
In their time serving as resource parents, Lisa says she has seen the difference it makes when a child has an advocate. When Manny was in the hospital Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, Lisa asked if she could give him “kangaroo care,” which means providing skin-to-skin touch and holding the baby closely. The staff was more than happy to oblige. As much as they may have wanted to offer kangaroo care themselves, the nurses simply did not have the time. If Lisa hadn’t asked, Manny would have missed out on those early nurturing cuddles, which are critical for the child's developing brain and healing process in the hospital.
The couple also learned how much support was available to them as a resource family. In addition to the education, training, and designated Clinical Case Manager that every Angel’s family receives, Angels also worked with an agency partner to subsidize counseling for Lisa and provided no-cost counseling for her. “Self-care is important if I am going to give good care to the children,” she says.
The couple is active in their church and says members are eager to help by providing infant and toddler items. “Not everyone can foster. But everyone can support children in the foster care system,” says Lisa.
After returning from their son’s wedding in May, Al and Lisa received their third (and current) Angel’s placement – a happy and beautiful baby, “Selah.” She is 6 months old and is a source of total joy in their household.
For Al and Lisa, neither their nest nor their hearts will be anything but full.
Interested in fostering, too? 
Can you help make a difference? 
