Serena and Dan liked the idea of serving as resource parents, but figured they couldn’t manage another child since they have four of their own: boys Sage, 15, Caelan, 13, Croix, 10, and their daughter Coralei, 7. And that’s not counting the dog, horse, and four chickens. Then they found out their friends, who also have four children, foster with Angels, and reconsidered. Maybe it was possible after all.
The couple agreed to attend an information session at Angels and their hearts broke when they learned of the tremendous need for resource families, especially for children under five years old in San Diego County. Angels also told them that the agency is committed to supporting resource families every step of the way.
Five months later, as Baby “Henry” babbles happily bouncing on Serena’s lap, the couple says Angels made good on its promise. “I can call the hotline anytime for trauma concerns and they are incredibly responsive,” Serena says. “I was blown away by their generosity too. At Angels there’s a closet filled with formula, diapers, clothes, toys and teethers. They were like, take whatever you need.”
When the couple first got the call asking if they were willing to foster Henry, they agreed and drove to the hospital where the infant was being released after recovering from multiple injuries. “He way tiny and would sleep most of the day, he wouldn’t make eye contact, and would startle very easily,” Serena recalls. Angels’ Clinical Program Director, an early childhood trauma specialist, came to their home for an assessment and reported that Henry was exhibiting many signs of trauma, more than she typically sees in infants that young. To develop attachment and trust, she recommended baby-wearing, and plenty of face-to-face contact. Angels’ Clinical Program Director also recommended black-and-white toys when he was awake and interactive.
The family’s children were all in from the start. “We were pleasantly surprised by how the kids are still into it. They absolutely love having Henry in our home,” Dan says. Even when they have had to make sacrifices, such as their mother not being able to drive them places. “We were late for school for two weeks straight,” Serena says.
Serena and Dan are preparing their children for Henry’s eventual departure from their home, reminding them that the baby is not theirs, and that they are caring for him until he can be with his family or somewhere that’s safe. “They understand, but they also want to make sure we’re going to foster another baby and help as many children as possible,” Serena says, as Henry flashes her a gummy smile.
“I feel so much joy and purpose,” says Serena, who is a stay-at-home-mom. “Just like I felt with my own kids. I love advocating for him, I love being a safe place in his life.”
Can you help make a difference?