Many prospective Resource Parents have concerns about how fostering will affect their own children. Chelsie and Tony were no different. Their daughter Wren was 3 years old when the couple decided to become Resource Parents with Angels Foster Family Network. They read Wren the children’s book “Families Grow,” which explains different family structures, then told her they planned to take care of a baby whose parents needed help. Wren looked genuinely curious when she asked her parents, “Who’s going to take care of me?”
Chelsie and Tony assured their daughter that they would still take care of her, and that they had plenty of love for both children. “She was instantly receptive,” Tony says. “She said the baby could wear her old clothes.” Then she made a request: Could her parents please hold her like a baby and feed her with a bottle?
“It’s so developmentally appropriate to play that out, so we embraced it and she said she was a baby for about two months,” Chelsie, an educator, says. Tony adds, “And there are times she says she’s a dog and goes ‘ruff-ruff’.”
Then newborn “Penny” came home from the hospital with Chelsie and Tony. Wren quickly lost her interest in pretending to be a baby, since she had a real one to play with. “In the mornings, Wren comes out of her room and walks right past me to see Penny,” Tony says with a laugh. “She’s adored her from day one. Wren has loved taking care of babies from before she could walk or crawl herself.” Her favorite thing to do is make silly noises and faces to make Penny laugh.
“We had fears about how Wren would react and respond, and navigate transitions,” says Chelsie. “It’s one thing to say that you will go through this season of love and grief, but bringing your 3-year-old along for it, now that’s a bold decision.” Bold, but rewarding.
“It’s a common fear for prospective parents, but fostering has been a positive experience for all of us,” Chelsie says.
Chelsie and Tony remind their daughter that Penny is with them temporarily. She asks how long the baby will be with them. “We tell her we’re not sure,” Tony says. “We tell her that we are going to enjoy our time with her and focus on the present.”
Penny has been with Chelsie, Tony, and Wren for a year now and Wren takes pride in being a helper and caregiver. She tells her parents she’s a “big sister” now. “It’s really sweet, the playful dynamic they bring to our home. The girls have a deeply beautiful relationship.”
Interested in fostering, too? 
Can you help make a difference? 
